Bad Jokes

Q: Why did Jesus go to Chinatown?
A: Because he loved miso.

Have you seen the movie "Constipated?" No, it hasn't come out, yet.

Q: You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed. On your right side is a sharp drop off, and on your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you. Directly in front of you is a galloping zebra and your horse is unable to overtake it. Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the zebra. What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?
A: Get your drunk @ss off the merry go round.

Q: What is the difference between being a butt-kisser and a brown-noser?
A: Depth perception.

A ship carrying a cargo of red paint collided with a ship carrying a cargo of purple paint.
Both crews were marooned.

Did you hear what happened to the guy that got behind on his payments to his exorcist? He got repossessed.

Q: What is the difference between a catfish and a republican?
A: One is a slime sucking bottom feeder and the other one is a fish.

Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
A: Because they have big fingers.